Tag Archives: #fulfillment

40 Relationship Red Flags You Should Watch For

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I’d say 90% of my readings are on love life challenges. If we could stay alert and watch for these signs when we meet someone, we could save ourselves a lot of pain down the road. I think this is a pretty good list, and I hope you will find it useful. AND it applies to men AND women!!

Here’s a few of them:

40 Relationship Red Flags You Should Watch For (As Told By 40 Women Who Didn’t)

They aren’t that committed

Don’t chase those who don’t seem as committed as you. If someone genuinely is interested in you or likes you it won’t be like pulling teeth to hang out or see them.

Believe them

If someone tells you they’re an asshole, believe them.

If he promises to break your heart, he will

I was seeing a guy who told me point blank to my face “I will break your heart as hard as I can.” My first reaction was to tell him he was a good person.

He was most certainly not a good person. He was barely capable of being an okay person. I seriously wish I could go back in time… grab Past Me by the hand, and get the hell out of there. It would saved me some major grief.

If he thinks he’s the only

If someone thinks they are unique as in literally the only person who sees the truth about the world and society…or that you are the only one who knows the truth about the universe…or both of you together are the only woke people in the world and everyone else and other institutions are all sheep. That’s a very bad sign.

“I’m damaged. Nobody understands me…”

A huge red flag I’ve learned is when a man (or woman) says ‘I should come with a warning label’… or some equivalent like; I’m damaged, no one understands me, I’m dangerous/edgy, I don’t play well with others… just take them at their word and leave. It’s not worth the emotional effort to get through to them and they will constantly use it as an excuse for bad or abusive behavior.

The Clinger

He insisted on spending every possible moment he could with me. Every single weekend he’d stay at my place… Any time I complained about anything he said or did, I was attacking him and making him feel bad, and he would make everything my fault until I felt bad and apologized for getting mad at him.

I dated him for two years before I realized he wasn’t my responsibility and I finally broke it off with him.

They aren’t there for you

When the person is never there for you. When you always have to be the one to support them and get nothing back. When someone is unable to be independent from their family and explains toxic, abusive or otherwise unacceptable behavior as “it’s just how they are”.

Being inconsistent and indecisive

In both romantic relationships and friendships: inconsistency and complacency. I’ve often tried to make excuses for people who are hot/cold, who don’t keep plans or put any effort into making plans, who don’t say what they mean and mean what they say. That kind of person is fun for a drink every once in a while, but they’re nowhere to be found when you really need them.

Doesn’t text back

If you get busy with work, etc for a long period of time but he doesn’t know, and still doesn’t text you. For example, when I get busy with work and my boyfriend knows, he will back off to let me focus on stuff; if he doesn’t know I’m busy and I don’t respond, he checks in on me to make sure everything is okay. I’ve dated guys who have gone two days without texting me and it wasn’t because they thought I was busy, etc, they just didn’t feel like talking to me.

Always an excuse

He always had an excuse for why he didn’t do what he said he was going to. Always with the excuses. The excuses were barely believable which was pretty insulting too.

Read the rest of them here

 

The importance of integrity

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Make an effort to be a person of character.  From my experience, I’ve found it’s the best thing you can do for yourself in your life.

Taking firm responsibility for yourself and your choices will set you apart from the crowd, and along with hard work, will bring you anything you want.

I was at a conference of female musicians once, and had the good fortune to hear Patti Smith reviewing her life and career. The most important thing in life, she said, is your credibility. If you lack credibility with people, or lose it, it’s hard to get it back. It’s the foundation of moving forward in life and finding true fulfillment and lasting friendships.

A friend posted this article today and I have to share it with you! These are traits I aspire to in my own life.

13 Traits of People With True Integrity

Integrity, for those who are not familiar, is quite important. It is the quality of being honest and having strong moral principles.
People who have a strong sense of integrity are sadly a rare breed. However, there are still some people left in this world with integrity, and usually, they share the following 13 traits.

1. They value other people’s time.
They value their own time so they also value the time of other people. They know you have plenty of other places you need to be and won’t hold you up. If you spend time with them, it is likely they will thank you for that as well.

2. They give credit where it is due.
They do not take credit for things they did not do. They will always credit those who deserve it. If you help this person with a project he or she will likely mention your name so you can take credit for your work.

3. They are authentic.
They are their truest forms. You won’t catch them in a lie or being fake.

4. They are always honest.
They are honest people that feel no need to lie as it is important for them to get to where they need to get in life honestly.

5. They never take advantage of others.
They are not the kind of people who will take advantage of someone else. They love to build people up and help them get where they need to be. Taking too much from someone else will never be an issue with someone who has a lot of integrity.

6. They do not argue over disagreements.
They will talk through things in a civil manner or not talk at all. You cannot and will not force this person into arguing over something completely ridiculous. I find this to be a very respectable trait.

7. They give most people the benefit of the doubt.
They try to see the good in everyone. I think this is because they feel like maybe there are more people in this world that also have integrity. That being said, if you take advantage of them too much they will get rid of you.

8. They know when something is bothering someone.
They have a great intuition that lets them know when something is going on. If someone is down in the dumps they will notice. Chances are they will actually do what they can to cheer you up.

9. They believe others.
They accept your word as truth until it is disproven. That being said, they do not take lying well. And once you lie to them, it is unlikely that they will ever take your word again.

10. They apologize first.
If they have done something wrong they will come to you and apologize. This is just how they are. They own up to their mistake and try to make things right.

11. They are humble.
They do not quite know their own worth. While they are very important and do so much good they don’t quite see it. You should remind them of it.

12. They do good when they can.
They are always helping other people. They love to know that they have improved someone’s life. It gives their lives meaning.

13. They are always kind to those who need it.
Giving kindness can go a long way. When someone looks like they need a little pick me up these people deliver. They can brighten up almost anyone’s day.

If you are someone who has true integrity, thank you for being who you are and thank you for all that you do. You really do actually make a difference in society, please keep up the good work. If you feel no one else is proud of you, know that I am.

Fulfillment

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“Everything I need shall be provided today. Everything. Say it, until you believe it. Say it at the beginning of the day. Say it throughout the day.
Sometimes, it helps to know what we want and need. But if we don’t, we can trust that the Universe does.
When we ask, trust, and believe that our needs will be met, our needs will be met. Sometimes God cares about the silliest little things, if we do.
Today, I will affirm that my needs will be met. I will affirm that the Universe cares and is the Source of my supply. Then I will let go and see that what I have risked to believe is the truth.”

– From “The Language of Letting Go”

 

Happy Love Day

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Happy Valentine’s Day! I love to celebrate love because it truly is the reason we are all here. It’s the most beautiful part of being human! Well, that and melted cheese, but anyway….

The majority of my readings are relationship readings, and I want to share a few things I’ve learned throughout my career.

  1. The future is unknown. If you “let go and let god”, you will be amazed at what the Universe brings to your life. I’ve seen it happen over and over again. Literally ANYTHING can happen, and I believe the Universe wants us to fulfill ourselves. I’ve seen people find happiness while being single; people that feel hopeless about finding love, sure that they will “die alone”, end up in exciting, committed relationships. I’ve seen relationships come back from breakups and recommit; I’ve seen people thrilled with “the chase” and the rush of new relationships learn to love themselves and the unfolding of love.
  2. Love is in your ACTIONS, not your words.
  3. You have to be in reality. It’s easy to get swept up in romantic fantasies, but in the end they keep you from being present with the person you’re getting to know. The person you meet in the first three months of a relationship is not the real person. People are shy and it takes time to trust each other. Be patient and get to know people. This will keep you from getting hurt most of the time. I heard once it takes three years to really know someone.
  4. Speak your TRUTH. What is your truth? What’s really going on with you and your partner, and are you holding back on communicating something you need to get off your chest? If your partner can’t receive your truth, and shuts down communication all the time, you might have grown past the person. True love is when both partners want the relationship to work and want to respect each others’ feelings, needs, desires and goals.
  5. Respect other peoples’ TRUTH. Listen to what your partner says and respect what’s important to them. Really Listen. What are the other person’s needs, feelings and goals? Then honestly look and see if you’re in alignment with each other.
  6. Be aware of when you’re projecting your past hurts onto others. I think relationships are little incubators for us to heal our past traumas. Not everyone is capable of doing this, and that’s OK, but your stuff WILL come up!
  7. Don’t date someone’s potential. It’s hard to remember that when you’re in the throes of infatuation, or if you’re a highly intuitive person. What is the person doing NOW in the present? Because that’s what you got 🙂
  8. BE Yourself. It’s OK if you’re not perfect.
  9. Take responsibility for your own happiness. You can’t fix someone, and no one can fix you. Each person has to save themselves. Relationships work best when two people, each whole unto themselves, come together to share their lives. Expecting someone to make up for your deficiency just doesn’t work.
  10. Trust your instincts. Your gut will tell if you if someone is right for you or not.
  11. Practice gratitude and validation everyday! This helps us focus on what’s working, rather than focusing on problems.

I LOVE this guy too:

Have a great day everybody!