Tag Archives: people pleasing

Week of July 1st

moonNew Moon in Cancer on Tuesday.
Mercury at 2 Leo.
Mars into Leo Monday, 7/1.
Venus at 26 Gemini.
Jupiter at 17 Sagittarius, retrograde.
Saturn, Pluto at 20ish Capricorn, retrograde

Monday 7/1: Moon in Gemini, into Cancer early evening. Careful not to offend anyone today; avoid social complications. Mars into Leo at 1:20pm. We are in the orb of the New Moon, a solar eclipse in Cancer, and emotions are near the surface. People are hyper-sensitive and unwilling to face conflicts. Go with the current of your life, and put your energies towards things you have control over.

Tuesday 7/2: New Moon, Solar Eclipse at 10 Cancer at 12:16pm Pacific. Avoid confronting anyone today – but allow yourself to be indulgent. Aries, Cancerians, Libras and Capricorns, be on your best behavior this week; keep yourselves well rested. Good day for creativity, love, tending plants and animals, opening up and clearing the house. We begin a new monthly cycle today.

Wednesday 7/3: Moon in Cancer all day. Simmering tensions can erupt, so keep your cool until you can approach a dispute in a calm and neutral way. Try not to take things personally.

Thursday 7/4: Moon in Leo. Today is a better day to seek acknowledgement and cooperation from those in leadership positions. It’s a good night to go out and socialize.

Friday 7/5: Moon in Leo. Definitely go and see a show.

Saturday 6/22: Moon into Virgo. Today we balance the books, do weekly shopping and get organized. Tackle anything requiring attention to detail.

Cancer:

The Sun is in Cancer until July 21st; cruising along with the North Node and opposing Saturn and Pluto at various points. This is a month of extremes, and balancing the need to nurture others with the more important task of taking care of ourselves. Learn to be your own Mother, and don’t depend on others to fill that role.

Cancer is ruled by the Moon, which rules the tides of our emotions, maternal instincts, fruitfulness, creativity, the womb, and other concepts around nurturing. It’s the most nostalgic of the signs, which means Cancerians are deeply connected to their families and ancestors. They are in spiritual communication with ancestral places and people. This quality also lends itself to psychic ability. They feel what’s going on with their surrounding people and environment.

Traditionally, the sign of Cancer is seen as the personality closely connected to the Home. Wherever Cancer falls in your chart, that is the place where you experience great sensitivity and fertility. Also, Cancer rules the 4th House, which symbolizes our Home and Family roots.  This makes Cancer uniquely gifted at communicating with house spirits and earth deities.

Because Cancerians “feel” things so tangibly, it’s difficult to have deep, real, constructive communication with them. They are like the crab on the seashore that moves side to side to avoid conflict – and often resort to passive-aggressive behavior. They hide in a thick, hard shell and are obsessed with security. They can be extremely moody as well. But on the whole, they are fantastic people to associate with, due to their vulnerability. They teach us all that emotions are real, important, and need to be valued and expressed to live a full life.

 

Week of April 22nd

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Sun in Taurus.
Mercury Direct in Aries: Refresh your mind and begin something.
Venus in Aries: Rebirth in art, love and finances. Make a fresh start.
Mars in Gemini
Jupiter retrograde (backwards) in Sagittarius
Saturn/Pluto conjunct in Capricorn

Keep a low profile this week, meet your responsibilities and don’t rock the boat. There is huge energy under the surface that is unearthed this week in our personal and collective lives, and we need to be nourished, contemplative and calm to walk through it.

Sunday, April 21st – We start the week off with a bang. Sun conjunct Uranus in Taurus shakes things up around what we value – especially our love lives. Our values, as well as home, possessions and finances, could take a completely different direction. Go with the flow and accept the change, because it is the path to liberation.

Monday, April 22nd – Moon in Sagittarius, Sun in Taurus. Get all loose ends tied up in preparation for the huge aspect on Wednesday.

Tuesday, April 23rd – Moon void of course in Sag most of the day. Try not to make big decisions or sign anything.

Wednesday, April 24th – Pluto is stationing (standing still above us) and turning retrograde (backwards) around noon Pacific time. At the SAME TIME, Pluto will be conjuncting Saturn (timing, responsibility and control). This is a huge turning point in our personal lives and the world. The US is also having it’s Pluto Return – which can stir up revolution, reform and massive change.
Individually, our toxic, underlying issues are rising up to be healed by Pluto. This spurs us towards a rebirth of the structures we have built in our lives by Saturn. This is a BIG DEAL. If you’ve been stuck in self doubt, self hatred or living out other people’s ideas, prepare to be liberated and reborn. If you’ve built your life on shaky ground, or avoided responsibility for your actions, prepare to grow up fast. Sacrifice your past mistakes and weaknesses in the great fire of Pluto and start anew. Seek the light within you. Encourage it to grow. This conjunction sets off a major reorganization of our lives that will gain steam and relevance over the next several months. The goal is to create a new, sustainable paradigm for true living.

If you’re feeling tired or sick this week, please rest.
If you’ve been moving too fast, slow down.
If you’ve been overly focused on gaining approval from others, practice self care.
Stay connected with friends and family.
Stick to the facts and don’t take risks this week.
Change your daily habits.

Thursday, April 25th – Moon in Capricorn activates the current Saturn-Pluto hubbub, bringing up emotional responses to the issues at hand. Leave the past behind and bring in what nourishes you.

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Rasmus Berggreen, Into the Abyss

Friday, April 26th – Moon void of course in Capricorn most of the day. Contemplate the changes in motion. We are in the last quarter of the Moon, so you don’t have to work hard or begin anything new for the next week. Just rest, let go of what you’ve outgrown, and wrap up loose ends.

Saturday, April 27th –  Moon in Aquarius. Mars square Neptune in the early morning. It’s a good day to embrace visions, and take action on the ones that really call to you.  Just be really clear on what you’re doing before you take action. Neptune can make you spacy or bring up the desire to play the victim.

Monday, April 29th – Moon in Pisces. And if all that wasn’t enough!!! Saturn stations retrograde above us in Capricorn at 5:55pm Pacific. When Saturn retrogrades, things in our lives can feel less stable. More developments from the Pluto-Saturn conjunction last week could arise.
Focus on why you are here. What is your purpose in this life? Are you accomplishing it? If not, how can you find ways to restructure your beliefs and your habits to help instead of hinder your mission?

 

Alanon meditation

ToolMe

The Language of Letting Go” is one of my favorite books of wisdom. Today’s sentiment really resonates with me, and I want to share it 🙂

Happy Monday!

Powerlessness and Unmanageability

“Willpower is not the key to the way of life we are seeking. Surrender is.

“I have spent much of my life trying to make people be, do, or feel something they aren’t, don’t want to do, and choose not to feel. I have made them, and myself, crazy in that process,” said one recovering woman.

I spent my childhood trying to make an alcoholic father who didn’t love himself be a normal person who loved me. I then married an alcoholic and spent a decade trying to make him stop drinking.

I have spent years trying to make emotionally unavailable people be emotionally present for me. I have spent even more years trying to make family members, who are content feeling miserable, happy.

What I’m saying is this: I’ve spent much of my life desperately and vainly trying to do the impossible and feeling like a failure when I couldn’t. It’s been like planting corn and trying to make the seeds grow peas. Won’t work!

By surrendering to powerlessness, I gain the presence of mind to stop wasting my time and energy trying to change and control that which I cannot change and control. It gives me permission to stop trying to do the impossible and focus on what is possible: being who I am, loving myself, feeling what I feel, and doing what I want to do with my life.

In recovery, we learn to stop fighting lions, simply because we cannot win. We also learn that the more we are focused on controlling and changing others, the more unmanageable our life becomes. The more we focus on living our own life, the more we have a life to live, and the more manageable our life will become.

Today, I will accept powerlessness where I have no power to change things, and I’ll allow my life to become manageable.”

April Rewinds: Astro Report

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Lots of retrogrades (and introspection) affecting us this month, giving us the chance to review our growth since the start of the year. We are slowing down, making sure we have solid foundations.

April 5th at 10:06pm (pacific): Saturn Retrograde in Sagittarius.
April 9th at 4:14pm: Mercury Retrograde at 4° Taurus.
April 10th at 11:08pm: Full Moon at 21° Libra.
April 15th at 3:18am: Venus (currently R) goes Direct in Pisces – exalted!
…and Jupiter Retrograde in Libra until June 8th!

And TODAY, Sunday, retrograde Venus in Pisces is squaring retrograde Saturn in Sag at exactly 27°. Partnerships are being seriously reevaluated this week. Relationships regarding love and business are tested to see if they can withstand the pressures of long term commitment. Saturn doesn’t fool around. Are you willing to do the hard work necessary to keep your pledge to another person? If yes, the relationship has a strong center and will probably be a lasting one. But if they are castles built of sand, they will diminish.

This is an important time to take inventory of what’s working and what’s not working, and to gauge the commitment level of each person. This tension will be accented by the Full Moon in Libra tomorrow, and Venus’s’ stationing at the end of the week.

There are four planets retrograding together this week. That’s pretty amazing! I can’t remember the last time this happened 🙂 In general, all of us need to:

  1. Re-evaluate things you’re committed to.
  2. Re-examine your VALUES and adjust if necessary. What’s most important?
  3. Start with getting grounded; take each day as it comes.
  4. Don’t expand into future worries – but deal with what’s in front of you right now.
  5. Be in the present.

The great RE-VALUE is here.

 

From Empowering Astrology:

“The planet of love and relationships has been retrograde since March 4. During this time we’ve had to take a deeper look at value, money, power dynamics, and how we connect with others. Retrogrades are merely times to integrate and reflect. The tide pulls in and out. Retrogrades are a yin phase, a time to reflect on the shadow. Venus Retrograde has put us through our paces and as it stations in Pisces on April 15, conjunct Chiron and square Saturn, we will have to face old pain around relationships and value and endeavor to move on to the next chapter of our lives.

Lastly, tomorrow’s Libra Full Moon will hit home on a lot of these deeper Venus Retrograde themes we’ve been sorting through over the last four weeks. Use the full moon to face or confront something you’ve been needing to confront. Use Saturn to set a boundary. Use Uranus to break from an old pattern. Use Pluto to leave something behind for good. Use Jupiter to have the faith that there is something better out there.”

Are You A Giver Or A Pleaser?

Excellent reflection on codependency, which I’ve also suffered from. My personal solution has been to stay PRESENT with myself, and to be clear about my motivations. I’d love to hear your thoughts in my comments section.

“Unfortunately when we live like this nobody wins because we lie to ourselves and those around us; and superficial dishonest relationships don’t last.”