CURRENTLY: Sun at 20 Libra Mercury STATIONING at 12 Scorpio Venus at 10 Virgo Mars RETROGRADE at 21 Aries (Rulership) Jupiter at 18 Capricorn (fall, very weak) Saturn at 25 Capricorn (rulership) Neptune RETROGRADE at 18 Pisces (rulership, strong) Pluto at 22 Capricorn North Node at 23 Gemini
We’re in the dark of the Moon this week, so don’t do anything, just rest. The Moon is waning until Friday, October 16th, when we have a New Moon in Libra.
Libra is ruled by the planet Venus, which is currently in an uncomfortable transit through Virgo. Venus is in her “fall” in Virgo, meaning her energies are bottled up or limited in expression. This causes tension, over analysis and controlling behavior in relationships. Try and keep communications open and clear with partners (of all kinds) this week.
Currently, Mercury is at a dead stop in the sky, and will turn retrograde (go backwards) on Tuesday. This event adds deep reflection to the already quiet nature of the dark moon. Over the next three weeks, Mercury will retrace it’s steps and go over ground we’ve already covered, triggering a regeneration in our thinking as it travels the corridors of Scorpio.
Mars retrograde, over in Aries, is still leading us through the underworld until November 13th. Our energy is directed inward, and we look at ourselves rather than taking action on people or situations around us. We reassess our ambitions while Mars is retrograde, and revaluate our life path and direction. It is a time to think about our actions, and whether they are aligned with the life and world we want to create.
What kind of life do you want to have, and are your current actions in alignment with creating it? If not, perhaps it’s time to make some changes.
Are your goals in alignment with your true and highest self?
Your energy and drive are valuable; is it worth what you’re spending our time on?
Monday, October 12th: Moon VOC in Leo ALL DAY! Try not to make big decisions or have important conversations, just spend your energy on being wildly romantic or creative 🙂 Also spending time with children or animals is productive.
Tuesday, October 13th: Moon in Virgo. Mercury Retrograde at 6:05pm Pacific. Ground through nurturing your needs and organizing your home life. Good day for releasing, purging and breaking bad habits. With Mercury stationing, watch out for crazy drivers.
Wednesday, October14th: Moon in Virgo, going VOC at 3:47pm Pacific. Chatty. Good day for talking, sociability and online activities. Issues could arise around understanding, truth, and honesty, as well as challenges with business. Focus on the goal.
Thursday, October 15th: Moon in Libra, and we are in the orb of the New Moon tomorrow. Balance, partnerships, justice and peace. Whatever began in April will come to a major fruition in the next two weeks!
Friday, October 16th: New Moon in Libra at 12:31pm Pacific. Moon goes void of course at 3:30pm for the rest of the day. Plans could change, best to go with the flow. If you need to have meetings or work through agreements, do it in the morning. Remember to focus on balance and win-win resolutions. Excellent date night.
Saturday, October 17th: Moon in Scorpio, Do Magick! We enter through another portal on our way to Halloween and deep Fall. It is the time when the veil between the worlds is thin, and we can see spirits. Expect occult experiences and deep conversations with people. With Mars still retrograde, reflect on passions and think about what corner of your life needs action.
CURRENTLY: Sun at 13 Virgo Mercury at 7 Scorpio Venus at 2 Virgo (debilitated, in her fall) Mars RETROGRADE at 24 Aries (Rulership) Jupiter at 18 Capricorn (fall, very weak) Saturn at 25 Capricorn (rulership) Neptune RETROGRADE at 18 Pisces (rulership, strong) Pluto STATIONING DIRECT at 22 Capricorn North Node at 23 Gemini
Pluto is standing still (stationing) and turned Direct today in the early morning. We are presented with revelations regarding our evolution this year… and there’s a lot of evolution happening. In typical Pluto fashion, the personal evolution we are each experiencing this year is tied to the deep changes in our society. The pandemic has shaken the foundation of the world, and our lives along with it. We have an opportunity this month to see how far we’ve come, and to judge where more work is necessary for our progress. Saturn and Pluto are moving veeerrrrry slowly as well: Saturn will be at 25 Capricorn until October 28th, and Pluto will be at 22 Capricorn until Nov 19, so if you have any planets in cardinal signs around those degrees, they are getting a wake up call.
Saturn is showing you what you’ll put up with and what you won’t – it presents your limits and boundaries – and shows you were to be disciplined and work hard.
Pluto is going to make you evolve, but it’s healing at the same time. It opens up your possibilities by transforming you in a natural way in agreement with your soul’s purpose.
Venus has entered Virgo, which is one of the most difficult placements for the planet. In Virgo she is in her “fall” or debilitated, and her energies are weakened. This effects women in general, and women might need extra support this month. One of the best ways to work with Venus in Virgo is to be of service to others, and tie up details and loose ends.
Then there is the issue of the President catching Covid the same week Saturn and Pluto turn Direct. The conjunction of Saturn and Pluto on January 12th spawned the Covid pandemic, and now as these planets are turning Direct, the president has caught Covid, and 31 states are surging with the virus. There is definitely karma involved here, as those are very karmic planets. One of the definitions of Saturn is “you shall reap what you sow”. This is especially true as Saturn and Pluto are both opposing Trump’s natal Saturn. And the week of Oct 12 when the sun will oppose Mars, Mercury retrograde begins, and the sun will square Pluto. Also Sunday Oct 18 when a T square occurs between the sun, Mars and Jupiter. Hang on, we have a wild two weeks ahead of us.
Are your actions and goals in alignment with your true and highest self?
Have your goals changed and do you want something different?
Monday, October 5th: Moon VOC in Taurus. Venus is Taurus’s ruler and she is currently debilitated. Avoid social complications and focus on work instead. Moon is trining (happy) with the planetary pile up in Capricorn, so you might get insights into working with the heavy energies at hand.
Tuesday, October 6th: Moon in Gemini. Chatty! Good socializing, networking and negotiation today.
Wednesday, October 7th: Moon in Gemini. Good day for talking, sociability and online activities. Mercury in opposition to Uranus around 2pm Pacific. This can bring sudden shifts, changes and insights. Listen to what the Universe is telling you today, and watch for signs and solutions to problems. For writers and other creative people this can be a time when flashes of genius brighten your creations, especially with the inspiring Jupiter Neptune sextile almost exact.
Thursday, October 8th: Moon in Cancer. People could be sensitive today, so allow for people’s feelings.
Friday, October 9th: Moon in Cancer. Lots of sensitivity, sweetness and nostalgia. Mars square Pluto. Look out cause this can cause fights and violence. Keep a low profile today. Arguments and drama will get you nowhere, so disconnect if someone wants to fight. Health breakdowns related to anxiety and frustration, the desire to dominate, to force a way without regard for anyone else, are among the negative qualities of this aspect. Don’t drive aggressively, and walk away from belligerence. Also, not a good time for risk taking as Pluto can have unexpectedly harsh consequences for those who heedlessly push forward.
Saturday, October 10th: Moon VOC in Cancer. Get creative and connect with friends; use your imagination and be receptive to inspiration and visions. Venus trine Uranus will bring some excitement to art and romance. Watch for unconventional romance and push creative boundaries.
CURRENTLY: Sun at 29 Virgo Mercury at 22 Libra Venus at 16 Leo Mars RETROGRADE at 27 Aries (Rulership) Jupiter DIRECT at 17 Capricorn (fall, very weak) Saturn RETROGRADE at 25 Capricorn (rulership) Neptune RETROGRADE at 19 Pisces (rulership, strong) Pluto RETROGRADE at 22 Capricorn North Node at 24 Gemini
We are in the season of CHANGE, the week of the Autumnal Equinox. This Tuesday sees the Sun’s entrance into Libra, which heralds the coming of Fall. It will be equal day and equal night – which is a fitting time to say farewell to our hero of equal rights, the brilliant Ruth Bader Ginsberg. It’s about bringing things into balance.
Mercury squares Pluto Sunday, giving a serious and cathartic vibe to communications this week. We release anything blocking us, or anyone arguing with us about our path.
We have another “Yod” this week too. Sometimes called “the finger of God”, a Yod is when a planet forms a slingshot configuration with two other planets. The key to working with this energy, is to focus on the sign and degree opposite the key planet. This week, Venus is the key at 19 Leo, forming a Yod with Neptune on one side, and Jupiter on the other. This Yod is about facing reality, as opposed to our fantasies and greed.
The Yod point is 19 Aquarius, and the sabian symbol for this point says: “a forest fire is being subdued by the use of water, chemicals and sheer muscular energy. Skill and courage are necessary to bring under control the destructive potential of carelessness and karmic visitations.” What is your personal forest fire right now?
Monday, September 21st: Moon in Scorpio. Face your life with courage and honesty. The pay off from facing hard facts and unavoidable limitations is huge. What reality do you need to embrace to achieve your goals? Be the snake shedding it’s skin. Scorpio is the sign of letting go of something you’ve outgrown, and welcoming the new you.
Tuesday, September 22nd: EQUINOX. Sun into Libra, Moon into Sagittarius. Day of Truth. Listen to any “messages” you receive from the universe. Flashes of insight can arrive suddenly! Pay attention to developments this week, and what you’re being “called” to do, and put your energies there.
Wednesday, September 23rd: Moon in Sagittarius. Mercury square Saturn today can bring serious communications. Avoid negotiations and airing of grievances today because authority could be stubborn and critical. You can use this energy to strengthen weaknesses, practice and study. Speak to someone older and wiser. Get organized, simplify, and get rid of what you don’t need.
Thursday, September 24th: Moon in Capricorn. Be mystical today, but embrace the Capricorn Moon and get to work too. Put effort into creative ventures.
Friday, September 25th: Moon in Capricorn. If you are a creative person, work on your projects! Time is well spent on disciplines and completing responsibilities. DO it.
Saturday, September 26th: Moon in Aquarius. Feel the optimism in the air today! Aquarius asks us to focus on the future, make plans, and involve our network of friends. Watch out for risky behavior though, since Uranus brings spontaneity, rebellion, and independence. Focus on expressing your unique genius.
Sunday, September 27th: Moon in Aquarius, and Mercury into Scorpio. Obsessive thinking, research, healing, secrets and deep conversations. Dig into the facts. Find ways to transform your life, to lift yourself and others. Obsessiveness and lust can take over our thoughts, so make great art instead. Healing and art can come from exploring dark places within us.
CURRENTLY: Sun at 14 Virgo Mercury at 1 Libra Venus at 0 Leo Mars at 28 Aries (Rulership) Jupiter RETROGRADE at 17 Capricorn (fall, very weak) Saturn RETROGRADE at 25 Capricorn (rulership) Neptune at 19 Pisces (rulership, strong) Pluto RETROGRADE at 22 Capricorn North Node at 25 Gemini
We’re in the dark of the Moon this week, so don’t do anything, just rest. The Moon is waning until next Thursday, September 17th when we will have a New Moon in Virgo.
Currently, Mars is at a dead stop in the sky, and will turn retrograde (go backwards) on Wednesday. It will retrace it’s steps and go over ground we’ve already covered, retriggering the sensitive degrees which heralded Covid19. The earth shaking changes of 2020 were sparked by the rare and fateful conjunction between Saturn and Pluto on January 12th. Mars has been tensely squaring these planets for weeks, giving energy to the dynamic protest movements erupting around the world. Mars will now go back and wake it all up, continuing the intensity of this year.
On a personal level, Mars is taking us on a journey through the underworld until November 13th. This means our energy is directed inward, and we look at ourselves rather than taking action on people or situations around us. We reassess our ambitions while Mars is retrograde, and revaluate our life path and direction. It is a time to think about our actions, and whether they are aligned with the life and world we want to create.
What’s the truth right now… what are you DOING?
What kind of life do you want to have, and are your current actions in alignment with creating it?
Are your goals in alignment with your true and highest self?
Your energy and drive are valuable; is it worth what you’re spending our time on?
Have your goals changed and do you want something different?
The North Node in Gemini encourages us to connect online. It’s up to us to let go of our repressed sexuality and anger (Pluto), welcome inspiration (Jupiter), and restructure our reality (Saturn). Venus in Leo, the sign of the heart, asks us to fall in love with ourselves and the creativity we hold inside, and share it with the world.
Monday, September 7th: Moon in Taurus. Great day to get out in nature or work in a garden… except for all of the smoke of course 😦 Cook an opulent mean instead. Taurus Moon is good for focusing on health and working with animals.
Tuesday, September 8th: Moon VOC all day in Taurus. Ground through nurturing your needs and home life. Make art.
Wednesday, September 9th: Moon into Gemini. Chatty. Good day for talking, sociability and online activities. Mars goes retrograde at 3:22pm Pacific. Tensions could be high today, so don’t dig too deep. Issues around sex, anger, and ambition may arise, as well as challenges with men. Focus on the goal. Avoid aggressive people, as violence can happen easily with Mars stationary retrograde.
Thursday, September 10th: Moon in Gemini. Good communications today, but stay civil.
Friday, September 11th: Moon in Cancer. Lots of sensitivity, sweetness and nostalgia. Arguments and drama will get you nowhere, so disconnect if someone wants to fight. Avoid overindulgence, except with food. Good movie night.
Saturday, September 12th: Moon in Cancer, Jupiter DIRECT in Capricorn. Sagittarians will feel great today with their ruling planet going the right direction. For the rest of us it’s a mixed bag. The desire for drugs and alcohol can be strong. Bring some compassion into your day. Use your imagination today and be receptive to inspiration and visions.
CURRENTLY: Sun at 1 Virgo Mercury at 7 Virgo Venus at 15 Cancer (neutral) Mars at 26 Aries (Rulership) Jupiter RETROGRADE at 18 Capricorn (fall, very weak) Saturn RETROGRADE at 26 Capricorn (rulership) Neptune at 20 Pisces (rulership, strong) Pluto RETROGRADE at 22 Capricorn North Node at 25 Gemini
Virgo Season and the beginning of Harvest. The days are getting shorter and our instincts turn towards the approach of Fall. Such a magical time of year! The seasons are about to change next month, and this shift can bring dramatic changes in our lives. After the craziness of this year, I hope the changes will move us forward towards personal empowerment. Now is the time to release and purge objects and situations from our lives that we cannot bring into the winter.
This week, Mars moves past it’s square to Saturn, finishing it’s contact with the “Covid Point” of Pluto, Saturn and Jupiter near 24 Capricorn. Mars in Aries gives good forward progress on all passions and drives – especially with regards to retooling our identities to fit the new paradigm. We are all fired up right now, especially where Aries falls in your chart. This is the place where you step forward and say “I AM”, this is important to me, and I will fight for it. All of us have an action plan we’re supposed to be following, and this week we figure it out.
Monday, August 24th: Moon in Scorpio and Mars square Saturn. That means our plans might face constructive criticism, postponement, hard facts and unavoidable limitations. What reality do you need to embrace to achieve your goals? Avoid social complications and focus on healing. Be the snake shedding it’s skin. Scorpio is the sign of letting go of something you’ve outgrown, and welcoming the new you.
Tuesday, August 25th: Moon into Sagittarius. Mercury trine Uranus around 8am Pacific. Listen to any “messages” you receive from the universe. Flashes of insight can arrive suddenly! Great for eye opening writing and communication. Pay attention to developments this week, and what you’re being “called” to do, and put your energies there.
Wednesday, August 26th: Moon in Sagittarius. Moon activates the “I AM” energy with Mars, bringing us some wisdom along with it. It’s a day of motion and looking at the big picture. It’s a lighter mood if you need to express something difficult or challenging to someone.
Thursday, August 27th: Moon in Capricorn; Venus trine Neptune around 2pm Pacific. Absolutely LOVELY aspect that enhances the arts, love, friendship and visions. Be mystical today, but embrace the Capricorn Moon and get to work too. Put effort into creative ventures.
Friday, August 28th: Moon in Capricorn. The great vibes from yesterday continue. If you are a creative person, work on your projects! Time is well spent on disciplines and completing responsibilities. DO it.
Saturday, August 29th: Moon in Aquarius; Mercury trine Jupiter around 6:30am Pacific. Inspirations abound. Feel the optimism in the air today! Aquarius asks us to focus on the future, make plans, and involve our network of friends. Watch out for risky behavior though, since Uranus brings spontaneity, rebellion, and independence. Focus on expressing your unique genius.
Sunday, August 30th: Moon in Aquarius, and Venus opposite Pluto at 6:30am Pacific. Events right now feel like fate. If there’s explosiveness with relationships, try to be kind and respectful of the other person’s feelings. Obsessiveness and lust can take over our thoughts, so make great art instead. Healing and art can come from exploring dark places within us.
CURRENTLY: Sun at 18 Leo Mercury at 11 Cancer (weak) Venus at 3 Cancer Mars at 22 Aries (Rulership) Jupiter RETROGRADE at 19 Capricorn (fall, very weak) Saturn RETROGRADE at 27 Capricorn (rulership) Pluto RETROGRADE at 23 Capricorn Neptune at 20 Pisces (rulership, strong) North Node at 26 Gemini
We’re in the dark of the Moon this week, so don’t do anything, just rest. The Moon is waning, or balsamic, until next Tuesday, August 18th when we will have a New Moon in Leo. There’s a lot roiling under the surface…
The current Sun in Leo is a wonderful time, since out brightest star has come home to his kingdom. We can let our hair down and be ourselves. The Sun symbolizes the soul and identity, and invites us to express ourselves. The background of Saturn, Pluto and Jupiter in Capricorn have changed how we do this. We can express ourselves, but we have to protect our fellow humans from the scourge of Covid19 at the same time. We need to wear masks and physically distance. The North Node in Gemini encourages us to connect online. It’s up to us to let go of our heavy worries (Pluto), welcome inspiration (Jupiter), and restructure our reality (Saturn). Leo, the sign of the heart, asks us to fall in love with ourselves and the creativity we hold inside, and share it with the world.
And then there’s all the stuff going in Aries which is INTENSE! We have Black Moon Lilith (wild feminine) joining forces with Eris (Goddess of Discord) – both hanging out with Mars (God of War). Yikes. These three are scary enough on their own, all sitting on their dark thrones at 22 Aries. They bring the absolute insistence to be ourselves, define our boundaries and fight if need be to make a point. Have you seen the violence in American cities over the past week? Stand offs and clashes between protestors and police, looters… and that horrible explosion in Beirut. These three are squaring (causing tension) with the three in Capricorn, causing the fall of old patriarchal structures, institutions, and governments (Saturn). Change is in the air.
This affects us personally too. We need to find our deep, repressed, toxic wounds and give them some air. Collectively, there is a new spotlight on the toxic wounds of slavery, racism, sexism and wealth disparity. It’s all coming up to be healed and shifted. We need to own all that we are, all that we’ve done, and all that we want to be; moving forward with justice and compassion for our fellow woman and man.
Mars square Pluto will be exact on Thursday, and will be continuing into October. This square can be violent and will turn the heat way up on simple disagreements. Be diplomatic and avoid risks. Seriously. The pandemic and rioting can increase the danger on the streets. Remember Pluto represents repressed sexuality, ambition, anger and masculinity. Lilith, Eris and Mars have the keys are letting this energy loose. Men in general, and Aries people, can get into a lot of trouble the second half of this year.
Monday, August 10th: Moon in Taurus. Authority can be stubborn today, so best to not rock the boat. However, if you want to bring stability to an issue, today is a good day to work on it.
Tuesday, August 11th: Moon in Taurus. Refocus on your needs and home life. Walk in nature, work in the garden and cook something scrumptious. Beware of overspending with online shopping.
Wednesday, August 12th: Moon into Gemini. Chatty day, good for talking, sociability and online activities. Tensions are rising though with tomorrow’s event, so don’t dig too deep.
Thursday, August 13th: Moon in Gemini. Mars, Lilith and Eris in EXACT square to Pluto. Stay in bed lol. Seriously though, lay low today and stay under the radar. This square could ignite big confrontations.
Friday, August 14th: Moon in Gemini, going into Cancer at 4:35pm Pacific. Probably the best day for reaching an understanding with others. Good movie night.
Saturday, August 15th: Moon in Cancer, Uranus RETROGRADE in Taurus. Get yourself grounded and centered before undertaking anything. Bring some compassion into your day.
Sunday, August 16th: Moon in Cancer continues… be kind to yourself and others. We are in the realm of the New Moon, so contemplate what you’d like to see happen in your life over the next month.
This is the most important thing a person an learn in their lifetime, and if you were never taught, you can learn it. Mastering this will make your life much better – in every possible way. If you struggle financially, or with loneliness, this could be part of it.
“It’s a shame so few of us are taught the basics of how to interact constructively with each other. If you never were, we’re here to help.
Learning social skills can be difficult if you weren’t exposed to traditional group dynamics as a child, if you struggle with a mental illness like anxiety or depression, or even if you just didn’t have a lot of positive role models when you were growing up. Young people tend to learn how to manage their own emotions, recognize those of other people and manage them both effectively by socializing. If these weren’t skills you developed growing up, don’t worry. You’re not alone.
The social foundation: emotional intelligence
Before we get to specific social situations, we should discuss the concept of emotional intelligence (or E.I.). Put very simply, E.I. is your ability to acknowledge your own emotions, recognize emotions in others and use that information to guide your behavior. This is a relatively new area of study in the field of psychology, and developing your own E.I. can help you understand and improve your social interactions.
There are several models of emotional intelligence, but for our purposes, we’ll look at the author Daniel Goleman. He outlines five general categories of E.I. that complement and support one another.
Self-awareness: This simply means being able to identify your own emotions and how they work. Are you anxious in loud environments? Do you get angry when people talk over you? If you know these things about yourself, then you’re practicing self-awareness. This can be more difficult than it sounds, but simply being aware of yourself is all it takes for this step.
Self-regulation: Taking it a step further, self-regulation deals with your ability not just to know your emotions, but manage them. Sometimes that might mean handling them as they come up. If you get angry, knowing how to calm yourself down is important. However, it can also deal with managing the emotions you will face. If you know that stalking your ex’s Facebook is just going to make you feel bad, self-regulation would help you go do something to better your own life instead.
Motivation: External factors like money, status, or pain are powerful motivators. But in Goleman’s model, internal motivation is a key component. This means that you know how to manage your own motivation and create or continue projects because you choose to, not because something outside yourself demands it.
Empathy: It’s just as important to be aware of the emotions of others. This might mean developing the skills to recognize how people are expressing themselves — can you tell the difference between someone who’s comfortable versus someone who’s anxious? — but it also means understanding how other people may respond to the circumstances they’re in.
Socialization: This area deals with your ability to steer your relationships and navigate social situations. It doesn’t mean controlling others, but understanding how to get where you want to be with other people. That might mean conveying your ideas to co-workers, managing a team, or dealing with a conflict in a relationship.
Every social situation is different and there isn’t always a “correct” way to handle any of them. However, when viewed through the lens of these core competencies, most social situations become a lot more manageable. We’ll go over some common scenarios even adults might struggle with, but keep in mind how these principles can apply in all situations.
Constructively confront someone
Confronting someone when you have a problem with that person can be scary. If you’re the type to avoid conflict, you might rationalize it away by saying you want to keep the peace, or you don’t want to upset anyone. However, this can be a way of avoiding your own feelings. If there wasn’t something bothering you, there would be nothing to confront anyone about.
Dr. Ryan Howes, a clinical psychologist, explained to Psychology Today that it’s our own fears that keep us from confronting others. Our fear that we’ll lose something we have, that we’ll hurt someone we care about, or that it will hurt but accomplish nothing. One of the first steps to constructively confronting someone is to recognize that fear in yourself and identify the real issues that led to the conflict in the first place. If you’re annoyed that your partner forgot your birthday, for example, ignoring how you feel about it won’t resolve the conflict.
Once you’re ready, Gregg Walker, a professor at Oregon State University, recommends having the conversation when there’s time to discuss the issue, focusing on “I” statements like “I feel hurt that we didn’t do anything for my birthday,” and describing behavior and your reaction to it, rather than hurling accusations. Healthy confrontations require a fair amount of awareness of your own emotions, so this is a good time to practice that skill.
Speak up and be heard in a group
Whether it’s a meeting or a party, any time you get more than a couple of people together in a group, it can become difficult (if not impossible) to get a word in edgewise. While most tricks on how to combat this involve managing how you talk — pausing in the middle of a sentence rather than the end, or finishing your sentence even if someone tries to interrupt — an often overlooked issue is managing how you react to being talked over.
It would be great if everyone was polite and let you finish or paused to ask what you’re thinking. This doesn’t always happen. If someone interrupts you and you become annoyed, that can kill your motivation to speak up again. Or you might become visibly agitated and demand to be heard, which can be off putting and make people less likely to want to listen to what you have to say.
Instead, Chris Macleod, counselor and author of “The Social Skills Guidebook,” suggests accepting that group conversations are a “vortex of noise and chaos” and going with the flow. Don’t spend all your time trying to fit in that one thing you badly wanted to say. Instead, go with the flow of the conversation and look for new opportunities to jump in. When you do, speak loudly and with confidence. More practical tricks like keeping your stories short or framing a complaint as a story can smooth over the experience, but regulating your own frustration and annoyance is the foundation these tricks build on.
Make (and keep) new friends as an adult
When you’re young, making friends can be relatively easy. School often means that there’s a group of people you’re required to hang out with who are your age. You may share some interests, and you’ll see one another almost every day. As an adult, it can be harder. Everyone’s busy, everyone’s tired, and time feels in short supply. Or so it seems. What really may be lacking is motivation.
As Vox explains, one of the most important keys to developing a new friendship is, well, showing up. You both say, “We should hang out sometime!” but for some reason you never do. Why? Sure, you have things going on, but you still managed to binge watch the latest “Stranger Things.” There’s nothing wrong with a little “me” time, but it’s also O.K. to spend some of it reaching out to someone new.
When making new friends, you have to start with some internal motivation. Decide for yourself that you’re going to make friends and then put yourself in situations where that can happen. Take a class, join a club, or just talk to people you know but aren’t friends with yet. More important, follow up. If you find someone you want to be friends with — and especially if there are indications that person wants to be friends with you, too — put it on the very top of your to-do list to follow up. You’ll be surprised how easy it is when you do it on purpose.
Strike up a conversation with someone new
Talking to a stranger for the first time — whether it’s at a party, a work event, or just on the street — can be complicated. You never know less about someone than when you first meet them. That’s also something you can use to your advantage. People like to talk about themselves. So much so that, according to research from Harvard University, people will sometimes even give up money to be able to talk about themselves.
You might feel awkward or uncomfortable when you’re out on your own, but practicing a little empathy can reveal a powerful truth: So does everyone else. Research from the University of Chicago found that less than 47 percent of its participants believed a stranger would be willing to talk with them. In reality, every attempt was successful. Most of us are willing to have a conversation, we just don’t always want to be the one to make the first move.
However, not everyone is open to a conversation with strangers all the time. An easy way to check is to pay attention to what they’re doing at the time. Are they wearing headphones? Do they seem in a hurry? Are they at their job and only making conversation as part of their duties? If so, you might try again later (or with someone else). If they’re not busy, start by saying hello or opening with a compliment. From there you can keep the conversation going with the “insight and question” method. Simply offer an observation or insight, follow it up with a question, and let the conversation flow naturally.
These are far from the only social situations you might find yourself struggling with, but the principles that can be applied are nearly universal. Acknowledge your own emotional state and manage your needs and feelings in a constructive way. Take the initiative to pursue the social outcomes you want, and empathize with others who are dealing with the same struggles you are. With practice, the rest of the complex nuances of social interaction will flow a lot more naturally.
Picatrix is the name used today, for a 400-page book of magic and astrology originally written in Arabic under the title غاية الحكيم Ghāyat al-Ḥakīm, which most scholars assume was originally written in the middle of the 11th century,
“Picatrix: an ancient manuscript that teaches how to obtain energy from the cosmos”
“Through this ancient manuscript…the reader could attract and channel the energy of the cosmos so that a certain event develops according to the will of the practitioner, zodiacal magic; which is said to help master and dominate with accuracy—through the force of the universe—nature and its surroundings.
The Picatrix is an ancient Arabian book of astrology and occult magic dating back to the 10th or 11th century, which has gained notoriety for the obscene natural of its magical recipes. The Picatrix, with its cryptic astrological descriptions and spells covering almost every conceivable wish or desire, has been translated and used by many cultures over the centuries, and continues to fascinate occult followers from around the world.
The Picatrix was originally written in Arabic, titled Ghāyat al-Ḥakīm, which translates to “The Aim of the Sage” or “The Goal of the Wise.” Eventually, the Arabic writings were translated into Spanish, and eventually into Latin in 1256 for the Castilian king Alfonso the Wise. At this time it took on the Latin title Picatrix.
The Picatrix is divided into four books:
Book I – “Of the heavens and the effects they cause through images made under them”
Book II – “Of the figures of the heavens in general, and of the general motion of the sphere, and of their effects in this world”
Book III – “Of the properties of the planets and signs, and of their figures and forms made in their colors, and how one may speak with the spirits of the planets, and of many other magical workings”
Book IV – “Of the properties of spirits, and of those things that are necessary to observe in this most excellent art, and how they may be summoned with images, suffumigations and other things”
A section from the English illustration known as the Ripley Scroll, based on a15th century original.
I just finished watching Season 2 of “Lodge 49” on AMC, and I highly recommend it if you’re interested in bettering yourself or walking a spiritual path. It’s a great reflection on what a spiritual community or occult lodge can do for people. I am currently involved with two lodges, and I found this show to be a great representation of my experiences there!
“Lodge 49 wins acclaim for its dreamily languid and unfolding plot and compelling characters, yet we never hear of it described as an occult themed show, which it most definitely is. This is most likely because of the emphasis of the weird over that of the showy and supernatural, but make no mistake, Lodge 49 captures the magical life beautifully. This is not the occult as wished for, this is the occult as it really is. In fact, I believe it is the most accurate occult show on television. This show is about people and relationships and finding the wonder that lies just beyond.
For several years now, we have been hearing about the meteoric rise of interest in the occult and witchcraft as people grasp to re-enchant a dark world. The rise in supernaturally themed media such as Strange Angel, Good Omens, Sabrina the Teenage Witch or American Gods both mirrors and supports this trend. In those shows, however, we see cosmic battles of good and evil being fought through fiery and dramatic magic.
Big personalities like Aleister Crowley or compelling underdogs like Sabrina manipulate their trials through spells, sorcery and sometimes inherited power, suggesting that magicians are, in fact, a breed apart. But anyone who has ever spent any time around committed occultists and witches knows that everyday magic looks nothing like that. Lodge 49 is quiet, eccentric, and deeply authentic. I know more than my fair share of people who belong to occult orders, and they all feel as though this show was written just for them. Obviously, that is a rather selective demographic, so the show’s success should tell us something about both the exquisite storytelling of the creators and cast of Lodge 49 and the eternal pull of the magical quest. When it comes to portraying the genuine occult experience and the cultivation of an enchanted life, Lodge 49 is the real deal.”